[Ron61]

HOW TO INSTALL
A SOUTHERN HOME
SECURITY SYSTEM

1. Go to a secondhand store and buy a pair of men's used
size 14-16 work boots.

2. Place them on your front porch, along with a copy of
Guns & Ammo Magazine.

3. Put a few giant dog dishes next to the boots and
magazines.

4. Splash a little watered down rusty red paint on the
sidewalk.

5. Leave a note on your door that reads:

Bubba,

Bertha, Duke, Slim, & I went for more ammo and
beer.

Be back in an hour. Don't mess with the pit bulls;
they attacked the mailman this morning and messed
him up bad.

I don't think Killer took part, but it was hard to tell
from all the blood. Anyway, I locked all four of 'em in
the house.

Better wait outside.


Be right back.

Cooter