[Bob In Ct]

It never seemed so true -

August 15 - Finally moved to our new home in Connecticut. It's so beautiful here. The lake to the north looks so majestic. I can hardly wait to see it snow covered. I'm going to love it here!

October 14 - Connecticut is definitely the most beautiful place on earth. The leaves have turned all the colors and shades of red and orange. Went for a ride through the park and saw some deer. They are so graceful. Certainly they are the most wonderful animals on earth. This must be paradise, I LOVE IT HERE!!

October 25 - Deer season will start soon. I can't imagine anyone wanting to kill such a gorgeous animal. Hope it will snow soon. I love it here. Those red and orange leaves have covered my yard. Looks like a magnificent multi-colored carpet. HOW BEAUTIFUL. Raking and cleaning up the yard will be an opportunity for invigorating exercise in the cool crisp air.

November 1 - Ah, more leaves today meant even more exercise. I feel great!

November 8 - Jesus, still more leaves. Guess it's best to wait until they've all fallen before I rake again.

November 15 - Finally, all of the trees lost their leaves and with today's final raking it's over for this season. Chiropractor suggested I use a lawn maintenance service next year. Only four blisters became infected. Should probably remember to use gloves.

November 30 - What the f--k? Where did all of those leaves come from? Had a little wind last night and the lawn is covered again. Oh well, they'll just have to wait until spring.

December 12 - It snowed last night, FINALLY. Woke up to find everything blanketed in white. Wow, it looks like a postcard. We went outside and cleaned the snow off the steps and shoveled the driveway. Had a snowball fight (I won) and when the snowplow came by we had to shovel the end of the driveway again. What a beautiful place. I Love Connecticut !

December 14 - More snow last night, I love it. The snow plow did his trick to the driveway again. I Love it here.

December 19 - More snow again last night. Can't get out of the driveway. Can't get to work. I'm exhausted from shoveling. F--king snowplow.

December 22 - More of that white **** fell again last night. As if dealing with the leaves weren't bad enough, now I've got blisters all over my hands from shoveling, must remember to wear gloves. I think the snowplow hides around the corner and waits until I'm finished shoveling
the driveway. The asshole.

December 25 - Merry Friggn' Christmas. More f--king snow. If I ever get my hands on that son-of-a-***** who drives the snowplow, I swear I'll choke the bastard. Don't know why they don't use more salt on the roads to melt the f--king ice.

December 27 - More white **** last night. Have been inside for three days except for shoveling out the driveway after that plow goes through every time. F--king gloves got wet and then froze on my hands. Doctor said it was just a mild case of frost bite, disfiguration is probably only temporary. Can't go anywhere, car is stuck in a mountain of white ****. The weatherman says to expect another 10 inches of the **** tonight. Do you know how many shovels full of snow 10 inches is?

December 28 - The f--king weatherman was wrong. We got 34 inches of that white ****! At this rate it won't melt 'till summer. The plow got stuck up the road and the bastard came to my door and asked to borrow a shovel. After I told him I'd already broken six of them shoveling all the **** he pushed into the driveway,I broke my last one on his f--king head.

January 4 - Finally got out of the house today. Went to the store to get food and on the way back I hit a damned deer that ran in front of my car. Did about $3000 damage. F--king beasts should be killed. Wish the hunters had killed them all last November.

May 3 - Took the car to the garage in town. The thing is rusting out from all the f--king salt they put all over the roads.

May 10 - Moved to Sarasota Florida . I can't imagine why anyone in their right mind would ever live in that God-forsaken state of Connecticut