[letsboogie351]

A very homely young woman made an appointment with a psychiatrist.
She walked into his office and said, "Doctor, I'm so depressed and lonely.
I don't have any friends, no man will come near me, and everybody laughs at me.
Can you help me accept my ugliness?"
"I'm sure I can," the psychiatrist replied. "Just go over and lie face down on that couch."

Two Irish farmers bought a truckload of watermelons, paying one dollar apiece
for them. Then they drove to the market and sold all their melons for the same
price they'd paid for them.
After counting their money at the end of the day, they realise they'd ended up
with no more money than they'd started with. "See!" said one. "I told you we shoulda
got a bigger truck."