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A man brings his best buddy home for dinner.
His wife screams at him. "My hair & makeup are not done, the house is a mess, the dishes are not done, I'm still in my pajamas and I can't be bothered with cooking tonight! What the hell did you bring him home for?"
"Because he's thinking of getting married...."
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The wife left a note on the fridge.........
"It's not working!! I can't take it anymore; I've gone to stay at my Moms!"
I opened the fridge, the light came on and the beer was still cold.........
What the heck is she talking about?!!
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I have noticed that on Cinco de Mayo day, not many people pretend to be Mexican.
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Ron has just retired and was having a discussion with his wife, Donna, about the future. “What would you do if I died before you?” Ron asked.
Donna thought about it for a while and replied, “Oh, I’d probably share a house with several other single or widowed women. Since I’m still in good health, I think that the other women could be a little younger than me.”
Then Donna asked Ron, “What would you do if I died first?”
Ron replied, “Probably the same thing.”
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