Not Ranked
Gabriels Horn
It was time for Father John's Saturday night bath and young
Sister Magdalene had prepared the bath water and towels just the
way the old nun had instructed. Sister Magdalene was also
instructed not to look at Father John's nakedness if she could
help it, do whatever he told her to do and pray.
The next morning the old nun asked Sister Magdalene how the
Saturday night bath had gone.
"Oh, Sister" said the young nun dreamily. "I've been saved."
"Saved? And how did that come about?" asked the old nun.
"Well, when Father John was soaking in the tub, he asked me to
wash him, and while I was washing him he guided my hand down
between his legs where he said the Lord keeps the Key to Heaven."
"Did he now..." said the old nun evenly.
Sister Magdalene continued, "And Father John said that if the Key
to Heaven fit my lock, the portals of Heaven would be opened to
me and I would be assured of salvation and eternal peace. And
then Father John guided his key to Heaven into my lock."
"Is that a fact..." said the old nun, even more evenly.
"At first it hurt terribly, but Father John said the pathway to
salvation was often painful but that the glory of God would soon
swell my heart with ecstasy. And it did, it felt good being
saved."
"That son-of-a..." muttered the old nun, "he told ME it was
Gabriel's Horn and I've been blowing it for forty years!"
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