Thread: Jokes
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Old 07-09-2017, 11:27 AM
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On a beautiful deserted island in the middle of nowhere,
the following people are stranded:

2 Italian men and 1 Italian woman
2 French men and 1 French woman
2 German men and 1 German woman
2 Greek men and 1 Greek woman
2 English men and 1 English woman
2 Polish men and 1 Polish woman
2 Japanese men and 1 Japanese woman
2 American men and 1 American woman
2 New Zealand men and 1 New Zealand woman
2 Irish men and 1 Irish woman


One month later, the following things have occurred:

One Italian man killed the other Italian man for the Italian woman.

The two French men and the French woman are living happily together
having loads of sex.

The two German men have a strict weekly schedule as to when they alternate
with the German woman.

The two Greek men are sleeping with each other and the Greek woman
is cleaning and cooking for them.

The two Englishmen are waiting for someone to introduce them to the English woman.

The Polish men took a long look at the endless ocean and one look at the Polish woman and they started swimming.

The two American men are contemplating the virtues of suicide,
while the American woman keeps on *****ing about her body being her own,
the true nature of feminism, how she can do everything that they can do,
about the necessity of fulfillment, the equal division of household chores,
how her last boyfriend respected her opinion and treated her much nicer,
and how her relationship with her mother is improving.

The two Japanese men have faxed Tokyo and are waiting for instructions.

The two Australian men beat each other senseless for the Australian woman,
who is checking out all the other men, after calling them both "bloody wankers".

Both New Zealand men are searching the island for sheep.

The Irish began by dividing the island into North and South and set up a distillery.

After the first few liters of coconut whiskey, they do not remember if sex is in the picture, but they are satisfied that a least the English are not getting any.
______

It's not easy being a man:

- If you work too hard, there's never any time for her; if you don't work enough, you're a good-for-nothing bum.

- If she has a headache, she's not in the mood. If you have a headache, you don't love her anymore.

- If you cry, you're a wimp. If you don't, you're an insensitive jerk.

- If you make a decision without consulting her, you're a chauvinist; if she makes a decision without consulting you, she's a liberated woman.

- If you get a promotion ahead of her, it's favoritism. If she gets a job ahead of you, it's equal opportunity.

- If you want it too often, you're oversexed; if you don't, there must be someone else.
_____
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