[CobraDan]

A man went to visit his 90 year old grandfather in a secluded, rural area of the state. After spending the night, his grandfather prepared breakfast for him consisting of toast, greens and pan fried potatoes. He noticed a film-like substance on his plate and he questioned his grandfather....are these plates clean?
His grandfather replied.... those plates are as clean as cold water can get them so go on and finish your meal.
That afternoon, while eating the tofu sandwiches his grandfather made for lunch, he noticed tiny specks around the edge of this plate, and a substance that looked like dried mustard...
so he asked again......are you sure these plates are clean?
Without looking up from his sandwich, the grandfather says.....I told you before, those dishes are as clean as cold water can get them, now don't ask me about it anymore!
Later that afternoon, he was on his way out to get dinner in a nearby town. As he was leaving, Grandfather's dog started to growl and would not let him pass.... Grandfather, your dog won't let me out.
Without diverting his attention from the football game he was watching, Grandfather shouted, COLDWATER, GET OUT OF THE WAY!