[bliss]

My wife told me women are better at multitasking than men.

So I told her to sit down and shut up.

Guess what...

She couldn't do either!
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I hate it when you offer someone a sincere compliment about their mustache, and suddenly... she’s not your friend anymore.
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I'm going to hell..........................

in so many different religions.
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Exercise?

I thought you said "extra fries."
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Does wine count as a serving of fruit?
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Shaving with a razor takes a lot of courage.

I used to shave my privates with one.......

But I don't have the balls to do that anymore.
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I scared the postman today by going to the door naked.

I’m not sure what scared him more, my naked body or the fact that I knew where he lived.
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