[bonyhadi]

A life long supporter of the Democratic party was lying on his
death bed when he suddenly decided to join the Republican party.

"But why?" asked his puzzled friend, "You're Democratic through
and through! Why change now?"

The man learned forward and explained, "Well, I'd rather it
was one of them that died and not one of us."



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At a small parish in rural New England there lived a
priest, and several nuns. One day, one of the older nuns
was noticing that the rugs in the church were beginning
to fray. She went to the priest and told him,
"Father, I believe your rugs need to be replaced soon."

The priest thanked her for bringing it to his attention, and
told her that he thought that she had been there long enough
to refer to church property as 'our' not 'your.'

A few days later the parish received word that the bishop
would be coming for a visit. The entire parish was busy
readying the church for the visit. On the day the bishop
arrived, the same nun came down the front stairs
yelling, "Father! Father! I found your watch!"

The bishop said, "How wonderful my child. Where did you
find it?"

After saying hello to the bishop, the nun turned to the priest
and said, "I found it under OUR bed."



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A little old lady had two monkeys for years. One day
one of them died of natural causes. In grief, the
second monkey passed away two days later. Not knowing
what to do with them, she finally decided to take
them to the taxidermist and have them stuffed.

After telling the owner of her wishes, he asked her,
"Do you want them mounted?" Blushing, she said,
"No. Shaking hands will be fine."