[bonyhadi]

A cowboy walked into a barber shop, sat on the
barber's chair and said, "I'll have a shave and
a shoe shine."

The barber began to lather his face while a woman
with the biggest, firmest, most beautiful breasts
that he had ever seen knelt down and began to
shine his shoes.

The cowboy said, "Young lady, you and I should
go and spend some time in a hotel room."

She replied, "I'm married and my husband wouldn't
like that.

The cowboy said, "Tell him your working overtime
and I'll pay you the difference."

She said, "You tell him. He is the one shaving you."
















There was a couple going at it for the first time,
and they were going at it for a while when the guy
asks the woman to open her legs a little wider.

She does and they continue.

A few minutes go by and he asks her again, "open
your legs a little wider".

She does, then he asks again, "a little wider hun".

The woman starts getting pissed off but she does it.

Till finally he asks again, "Can you open them just
a little wider?"

So she finally yells "what are you trying to do get
your balls in too?"

He says "no, I'm trying to get them out."











A mother was working in the kitchen listening to
her son playing with his new electric train in
the living room.

She heard the train stop and her son saying,
'All you sons of *****es who want off, get the
hell off now, 'cause this is the last stop. And all
you sons of *****es who are getting on, get your
arses in the train, 'cause we're going down the
tracks.'

The horrified mother went in and told her son,
'We don't use that kind of language in this house.
Now I want you to go to your room and you are to
stay there for two hours. When you come out, you
may play with your train, but I want you to use
nice language.'

Two hours later, the son came out of the bedroom
and resumed playing with his train. Soon the train
stopped and the mother heard her son say,
'All passengers who are disembarking the train,
please remember to take all of your belongings
with you. We thank you for riding with us today
and hope your trip was a pleasant one. We hope
you will ride with us again soon.'

She hears the little boy continue
'For those of you just boarding, we ask you to
stow all of your hand luggage under your seat.
Remember, there is no smoking on the train. We
hope you will have a pleasant and relaxing journey
with us today.'

As the mother began to smile, the child added,
'For those of you who are pissed off about the
two-hour delay, please see the ***** in the kitchen.'