Statistical Findings:
10% of the women had sex within the first hour of their first date
20% of the men had sex in a nontraditional place
36% of the women favor nudity
45% of the women prefer dark men with blue eyes
46% of the women experienced anal sex
70% of the women prefer sex in the morning
80% of the men have never experienced homosexual relations
90% of the women would like to have sex in the forest
99% of the women have never experienced sex in the office.
Conclusion:
Statistically speaking, you have a better chance of having anal sex in
the morning with a strange woman in the forest than to have sex in the
office at the end of the day.
Moral:
Do not stay late in the office. Nothing good will ever come of it!
Safety Tips For Men Who Visit XXX Websites
1. It is unsafe to lick your monitor while it is on.
2. The orifices in the back of your monitor are *not* intended
for participation in live sex shows.
3. The fan in your computer's power supply is not a good place
to cool your "heat of passion" (although, it would certainly
be an enlightening experience).
4. Be prepared to replace your keyboard often if you enjoy
"tickling the keys" with your manhood.
5. Semen IS electrically conductive!
Maude and Claude
Maude and Claude, both 91, lived
in a senior citizen's residence.
They met in the social center and
discovered over time that they enjoyed
each other's company. After several
weeks of meeting for coffee, Claude
asked Maude out for dinner and she
accepted. They had a lovely evening.
Afterwards, Claude asked Maude to
join him at his place for an
after-dinner drink. Things continued
along a natural course and, age
being no inhibitor, Maude soon joined
Claude for amost enjoyable roll in
the feathers.
As they were basking in the glow
of the magic moments they shared,
each was lost for a time in their
own thoughts.
Claude was thinking: "If I'd known
she was a virgin, I'd have been more
gentle."
Maude was thinking: "If I'd known
he could still get it up, I'd have
taken off my pantyhose."