[bonyhadi]

Rabbit Joke

A man is driving along a highway and sees a rabbit jump out across the middle of the road. He swerves to avoid hitting it, but
unfortunately the rabbit jumps right in
front of the car. The driver, a sensitive man as well as an animal lover, pulls over and gets out to see what has become of the
rabbit. Much to his dismay, the rabbit
is dead. The driver feels so awful that he begins to cry. A beautiful blonde woman driving down the highway sees a man crying on
the side of a road and pulls over.
She steps out of the car and asks man what's wrong. "I feel terrible," he explains, "I accidentally hit this rabbit and killed
it." The blonde says, "Don't worry." She runs
to her car and pulls out a spray can. She walks over to the limp, dead rabbit, bends down, and sprays the contents onto the
rabbit.The rabbit jumps up, waves its
paw at the two of them and hops off down the road. Ten feet away the rabbit stops, turns around and waves again, he hops down the
road another 10 feet, turns
and waves, hops another ten feet, turns and waves, and repeats this again and again and again, until he hops out of sight. The
man is astonished. He runs over to
the woman and demands, "What is in that can? What did you spray on that rabbit?" The woman turns the can around so that the man
can read the label. It says

Are you ready for this?)


(Are you sure?)


(This is bad!)

(You know you could just click off and not read the punch line)

(You know your gonna be sorry)

(Last chance)

(OK, here it is)

It says, "Hair Spray - Restores life to dead hair, adds permanent wave"














Nick the Dragon Slayer was an official in King Arthur's court. He had a long-standing obsession to nuzzle the beautiful Queen's
voluptuous breasts, but he knew the
penalty for this would be death.
.
One day he revealed his secret desire to his colleague, Horatio the Physician, who was the King's chief doctor. Horatio the
Physician exclaimed that he could
arrange for Nick the Dragon Slayer to satisfy his desire, but it would cost him 1,000 gold coins to arrange it.
.
Without pause, Nick the Dragon Slayer readily agreed to have Horatio the Physician arrange it and that he would gladly pay the
1,000 gold coins for the chance to
satisfy his desires for the Queen.
.
The next day, Horatio the Physician made a batch of itching powder and poured a little bit into the Queen's massive brassiere
while she was taking a bath! . Soon
after she dressed, the itching commenced and grew intense.
.
Upon being summoned to the Royal Chambers to address this incident, Horatio the Physician informed the King and Queen that only a
special saliva if applied for
four hours, would cure this type of itch, and that tests had shown that only Nick the Dragon Slayer had the antidote present in
his saliva to cure the itch.
.
King Arthur quickly summoned Nick the Dragon Slayer. Horatio the Physician then slipped Nick the Dragon Slayer the antidote for
the itching powder, which he
quickly put it into his mouth, and for the next four hours, worked passionately on the Queen's voluptuous and magnificent
breasts.
.
The Queen's itching was eventually relieved, and Nick the Dragon Slayer left satisfied and as a hero.
.
Upon returning to his chamber,Nick the Dragon Slayer found Horatio the Physician demanding his payment ! of 1,000 gold coins.
With his obsession now satisfied,
Nick the Dragon Slayer could have cared less, and knowing that Horatio the Physician could never report this matter to the King
shooed him away with no payment
made.
.
The next day, Horatio the Physician slipped a massive dose of the same itching powder into King Arthur's loincloth. King Arthur
quickly summoned Nick the Dragon
Slayer...
.
.
MORAL OF THE STORY: Pay your bills.










PARROTS

A lady goes to her priest one day and tells him, "Father, I have a problem. I have two female parrots, but they only know how to
say one thing." "What do they say?"
the priest inquired. They say, "Hi, we're hookers! Do you want to have some fun?" "That's obscene!" the priest exclaimed, then he
thought for a moment. "You
know," he said, "I may have a solution to your problem. I have two male talking parrots, which I have taught to pray and read the
Bible. Bring your two parrots over
to my house, and we'll put them in the cage with Francis and Job. My parrots can teach your parrots to praise and worship, and
your parrots are sure to stop
saying...that phrase...in no time." "Thank you," the woman responded, "this may very well be the solution." The next day, she
brought her female parrots to the
priest's house. As he ushered her in, she saw that his two male parrots were inside their cage holding rosary beads and praying.
Impressed, she walked over and
placed her parrots in with> > them. After a few minutes, the female parrots cried out in unison: "Hi, we're hookers! Do you want
to have some fun?" There was
stunned silence. Shocked, one male parrot looked over at the other male parrot and exclaimed, "Put the beads away, Frank. Our
prayers have been answered!"