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Old 07-23-2002, 03:28 PM
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bonyhadi bonyhadi is offline
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Old Age 1:
Two elderly ladies had been friends for many decades. Over the years they
Had shared all kinds of activities and adventures. Lately, their activities
had been limited to meeting a few times a week to play cards.
One day they were playing cards when one looked at the other and said, "Now
don't get mad at me..... I know we've been friends for a long time, but I
just can't think of your name! I've thought and thought, but I can't
remember it. Please tell me what your name is." Her friend glared at her.
For at least three minutes she just stared and glared at her. Finally she
said, "How soon do you need to know?"

Old Age 2:
Two elderly women were eating at a restaurant one morning. Ethel noticed
something funny about Mable's ear and she said, "Mable, did you know you've
got a suppository in your left ear?" Mable answered, "I have? A
suppository?" She pulled it out & stared at it. Then she said, "Ethel, I'm
glad you saw this thing. Now I think I know where my hearing aid is."











The Pope, Billy Graham and Oral Roberts were in a three-way plane crash over the Atlantic Ocean. Tragically, they all died and
went to the Pearly Gates together.
"Oh, this is terrible," exclaimed St. Peter. "I know you guys think we summoned you here, but we weren't expecting you, and
your quarters just aren't ready. We
can't take you in just yet and we can't send you back."

Then he got an idea. He picked up the phone. "Lucifer, this is Pete. Hey, I got these three guys up here. They're ours, but
we weren't expecting them, and we
gotta fix a place up for 'em. I was hoping you could put them up for a while. It'll only be a couple of days. I'll owe you
one." Reluctantly, the Devil agreed.

Two days later, St. Peter's phone rang. "Pete, this is Lucifer. Hey, you gotta come get these three clowns. This Pope fellow
is forgiving everybody, the Graham
guy is saving everybody, and that Oral Roberts has raised enough money to buy air conditioning!"













The Mexican Bungee!!!

Two guys are bungee-jumping one day. The first guy says to the second,

"You know, we could make a lot of money running our own bungee-jumping service in Mexico, because labor is cheaper and other
costs."

The second guy thinks this is a great idea, so the two pool their money and buy everything they'll need - a tower, an elastic
cord, insurance, etc.

They travel to Mexico and begin to set up on the square. As they are constructing the tower, a crowd begins to assemble to see
this new attraction. Slowly, more
and more people gather to watch them at work.

When it's time to test their system, the first guy jumps. He bounces at the end of the cord, but when he comes back up, the
second guy notices that he has a few
cuts and scratches.

Unfortunately, the second guy isn't able catch him. He falls back toward the cheering crowd, bounces and comes back up again.

This time, he is bruised and bleeding. Again, the second guy misses him. The first guy falls again and bounces back up. This
time, he comes back pretty messed up
- he's got a couple of broken bones and is almost unconscious.

Luckily, the second guy finally catches him this time and says, "What happened? Was the cord too long?"

The first guy says, "No, the cord was fine, but what the heck is a 'Pinata'?"
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