[bonyhadi]

RECIPE FOR MAKING LOVE

INGREDIENTS:
4 Laughing eyes
4 Well-shaped legs
4 Loving arms
2 Firm milk containers
2 Nuts
1 Fur-lined mixing bowl
1 Firm banana

DIRECTIONS :

1. Look into laughing eyes.

2. Spread well-shaped legs with loving arms.

3. Squeeze and massage milk containers very gently.

4. Gently add firm banana to mixing bowl, working in
and out until well creamed. For best results, continue to
knead milk containers

5. As heat rises, plunge banana deep into mixing
bowl and cover with nuts, leave to soak (preferably
NOT overnight).

6. The cake is done when banana is soft. If banana
doesn't soften, repeat steps 3-5 or change mixing
bowls.

NOTES:
1. If you are in an unfamiliar kitchen, wash tensils
carefully before and after use.

2. Do not lick mixing bowl after use.

3. If cake rises, leave town. ASAP
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A man took his Rottweiler to the vet and said, "My dog's
cross-eyed, is there anything you can do for him?"

"Well," said the vet, "let's have a look at him."

So he picks the dog up and has a good look at its eyes. "Hmm,"
says the vet, "I'm afraid I'm going to have to put him down"

"Just because he's cross-eyed?" says the man.

"No, because he's really heavy," said the vet.
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1. Only in America......can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.
2. Only in America......are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink.
3. Only in America......do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store
to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.
4. Only in America......do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, & diet coke.
5. Only in America......do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the
counters.
6. Only in America......do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put
our useless junk in the garage.
7. Only in America......do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call
waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place.
8. Only in America......do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten & buns in packages of eight.
9. Only in America......do we use the word 'politics' to describe the process so well: 'Poli' in
Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning bloodsucking creatures'.
10. Only in America......do they have drive-up ATM machines with braille lettering.
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EVER WONDER

Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?
Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?
Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?
Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?
Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?
Why is it that to stop Windows 98, you have to click on "Start"?
Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real
lemons?
Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?
Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?
When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it?
Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?
Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes?
Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?
Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?
Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?
If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?
If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?
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