[bonyhadi]

Q: Aside from chatting, what else can I do on the Internet?
A: You can join one of the thousands of forums wherein people,
by posting messages, discuss political topics of the day.

Q: Like what?
A: Barry Manilow.

Q: There's a forum for Barry Manilow?
A: There's a forum for everything.

Q: What happens on these forums?
A: Well, on the Barry Manilow forum, for example, fans post
messages about how much they love Barry Manilow, and other fans
respond by posting messages about how much they love Barry
Manilow, too. And then sometimes the forum is invaded by people
posting messages about how much they hate Barry Manilow, which
in turn, leads to angry counter messages and vicious name-calling
that can go on for months.

Q: Just like junior high school!
A: But even more pointless.

Q: Are there forums about sex?
A: Zillions of 'em.

Q: What do people talk about on those?
A: Barry Manilow.

Q: No, really.
A: OK, they talk about sex, but it is not all titillating. Often,
you'll find highly scientific discussions that expand the frontiers
of human understanding.

Q: It is a beautiful thing, the Internet.
A: Indeed it is.
==============
Confucius Says....

... woman who go to man's apartment for snack, get titbit.
... man who lay woman on ground, get piece on earth.
... man who get kicked in testicles, left holding the bag.
... man who kisses girl's behind, get crack in face.
... passionate kiss like spider web, lead to undoing of fly.
... man with hole in pocket, feel cocky.
... man who fight with wife all day, get no piece at night.
... virginity like balloon, one prick, all gone.
... girl who ride bicycle, peddle ass all over town.
... he who fart in church, sit in own pew.
... baseball no sport, man with four balls cannot walk.
... man who live in glass house, dress in basement.
... Kotex is not best thing on earth, is next-to-best thing on earth.
... man with penis in peanut butter jar, f_cking nuts.
... man who walk through airport door sideways, going to Bangkok.
... man who drop watch in toilet, bound to have ****ty time.
... man who take lady on camping trip, have one intent.
... man who go to bed with stiff problem, wake with solution in hand.
... man who stand on toilet, high on pot.
... man who buy drowned cat, get wet *****.
... it is good for girl to meet boy in park, but better for boy to park meat in girl.
... man who jizz in cash register, come into money.
... man who finger girl having period, caught red handed.
... man trapped in pantry, have ass in jam.
... man who eat too many prunes, get good run for money.
... man who go to bed with itchy asshole, wake with stinky finger.
... learn to masturbate, come in handy.
... war not determine who right, war determine who left.
... naked man fear no pickpocket.
... squirrel who run up woman's leg, not find nuts.
... the end of day is near when small men make long shadows.
... better to be pissed off than pissed on.
... woman who cook carrots and peas in same pot, not sanitary.
... couple on seven day honeymoon, make whole week.
... girl who sit on jockey's lap get hot tip.
... girl who sit on judge's lap get honorable discharge.
... waitress who sit on leper's lap, keep tip.
... butcher who back into meat grinder, get a little behind in his work.
... man who stand on street corner with hands in pockets, feeling nuts.
... man who shoot off mouth, expect to lose face.
... man who snort coke, get bubbles up nose.
... man with big mouth, beware of foot.
... man who fly upside down have crack up.
... man who leap off cliff, jump to conclusion.
... shallow woman like man with short temper.
... man under wheelbarrow playing with tool, not necessarily mechanic.
... house without bathroom, uncanny.
... foolish man give wife grand piano, wise man give wife upright organ.
... man who eat many prunes, sit on can for many moons.
... man who sleep with *****y wife, wake with itchy trigger-finger.
... man who sit on stool, smell like ****.
... man with tight trousers, pressing his luck.
... man who throw dirt, losing ground.
... man who fishes in other's holes, get crabs.
... he who live in stone house, should not throw glasses.
... cow with no legs, ground beef.
... two wrongs not make right, but two rights make U-turn.
... baby born in car with automatic transmission, grow to become shiftless bastard.
... bird in hand, make difficult to blow nose.
... finding old man in dark, not hard.
... man who smoke pot, choke on handle.
... OK for **** to happen, will decompose.
... man with head on railroad track, listening for train to come, get splitting headache.
... sailor who get discharged from navy, leave buddies behind.
... secretary become permanent fixture, when screwed on desk.
... do not drink and park, accidents cause people.
... he who crosses ocean twice without washing, dirty double crosser.
... too many light bulb jokes, soon burn out.
... takes many nails to build crib, but only one screw to fill it.
... never raise hands to angry child, leave groin exposed.
... man who drive like hell, bound to get there.
... man who keep feet firmly planted on ground, have trouble putting on pants.
... man who sit on tack, get point.
... man who run behind car, get exhausted.
... man who put cream in tart, not always baker.
... man who let woman on top, f_cking up.
... woman who spend much time on bedspring, may get offspring.
... sex on beach like American beer, f_cking near water.
... man like baby, want to suck tit all day.
... man who masturbate, only screwing himself.
... woman who dance wearing jock strap, have make believe ballroom.
... support bacteria, is only culture some people have.
... man who eat too many jellybean, fart in technicolor.
... man who marry girl with no bust, have right to feel low down.
... man with athletic finger, make broad jump.
... man who speak with forked tongue, should not kiss balloons.
... man who lose key to girlfriend's apartment, not get new key.
... he who sit on upturned tack, rise above all.
... even greatest of whales, helpless in desert.
... wash face in morning, neck at night.
... elevator smell different to midget.
... America good place for Chinese restaurant.
... no man is island, but some women are whales.
... he who have last laugh, not get joke.
... man who sleep with old hen, find it better than pullet.
... he who outrun cheetah, f_cking fast on his 0feet.
... man trapped in sewer, eat **** and die.
... man who f_ck ugly dog, get howled at.
... all men eat, but Fumanchu.
... he who eat crackers in bed, have crummy sleep.
... he who sneeze without tissue, take matter in own hands.
... wise man never play leapfrog with unicorn.
... he who sniff coke, drown.
... Macintosh computer, like man making love in cemetery, f_cking near dead.
... man piss in wind, wind piss back.
... man who pull out too soon, leave rubber behind.
... man who eat *****, do lip service.
... man with tool in woman's mouth, not necessarily dentist.
... girl who marry detective, like to kiss dick.
... men may have more hair on chest than woman, but on the whole, women have more.
... rape should not happen, woman run faster with skirt up, than man with pants down.
... woman wearing G-string, high on crack.
... virgin with thimble on finger, never feel prick.