Not Ranked
New York humor
A construction boss in Boston was interviewing men when along came a guy
named Vinny from New York. I'm not hiring any wise-ass New Yorker, the
foreman thought, so he made up a test hoping that Vinny wouldn't be able to
answer the questions, and he'd be able to refuse him the job without getting
into a dispute.
"Here's your first question," the foreman said. "Without using numbers,
represent the number 9."
"Widout numbiz?" Vinny says. "Dat's easy," and he proceeds to draw 3 trees.
"What's this?" the boss asks.
The New Yorker replies, "Ain't you got no brains?
Tree 'n Tree 'n Tree makes nine. Faghedaboutit"
"Fair enough," says the Boss. "Here's your second question. Use the same
rules, but this time use the number 99.
" Vinny stares into space for a minute, then picks up the picture he drew
and makes a smudge on each tree. "Dare ya go, Buddy."
The Boss scratches his head and says, "How on earth do you get that to
represent 99?
" Vinny says "Each a da tree's is dirty now! So it's dirty tree 'n dirty
tree' n dirty tree-dat's 99."
The Boss is getting worried he's going to have to hire the New Yorker, so
he says, "All right, last question. Same rules but this time use 100."
Vinny stares into space again, then picks up the picture once again, makes
a little mark at the base of each tree and says, "Dare ya go,Mac, a hunnert."
The Boss looks at the picture for a moment and says, "You must be nuts if you
think that represents 100!"
New York Vinny leans forward and points to the marks at the base of the
trees. "A little doggie comes along and takes a crap on each of dem trees,
so now ya got dirty tree an' a turd, dirty tree an' a turd, dirty tree an' a
turd --
which makes one hundred. Bada boom, bada bing. When do I freakin' start?"
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