[Hotfingrs]

Q. What is the purpose of the male body?

A. A life support system for a penis.

Thought for the Day: After a certain age, if you don't wake up
aching in every joint, you are probably dead.

Q. What's the only thing divorce proves?

A. Whose mother was right in the first place

Thought for the Day: There is no woman you don't want to have sex
with, just some you don't want anyone to know you had sex with.

Isn't making a smoking section in a restaurant a little like making a
peeing section in a swimming pool?

Golf IS the perfect thing to do on Sunday because you end up praying a
lot

I stopped smoking and extended my life expectancy; My wife is furious.

One poll says 73% of Americans favor raising the cigarette tax. It's
only fair. Since smokers aren't around as long as everyone else, they
should pay more while they're here.

I quit smoking once for six days. And then they untied me.

Remember, smoking doesn't kill people. People who are trying to quit
smoking kill people.