True But Strange Sex Facts
Largest erect penis: 13" Smallest erect: 1.75"
The Caramoja tribe of northern Uganda tie a weight the end of their penises to enlongate them sometimes to such a degree that the men
literally have to knot them up.
In 1609 a doctor named Wecker found a corpse in Bologna with 2 penises. Since then, there have been 80 documented cases of men w/
the same.
During foreplay, a woman's breast can increase in up to 25%.
The maximum depth at which vaginal stimulation occurs is only 2".
In the 1950s, it was found out that 75% of men cum within 2 minutes of penetration, with the orgasm lasting no longer than a few
seconds. The longest documented for a women is one minute.
Among the Mangaians of Polynesia, 18 year old couples make love an average of 3 times a night, every night, until they're in their 30s,
when the weekly average drops to a mere 14.
The maximum speed at which the erotic sensations travel from the skin to the brain has been clocked 156 MPH.
Women are 30% more sexually active during a full moon, and the most common love making time in the US is 11:00pm.
Intercourse peaks in July.
Except for the 1/2 dozen men who've shown up in emergency rooms over the years because they got too intimate with a vacuum cleaner,
women are the more creative auto-eroticists, and they masturbate most frequently when in a stable relationship. Women are also better
self-starters. 60% claiming to have discovered orgasm on their own, as opposed to only 25% of men.
Castrated men live an average of 13 years longer than those not castrated. And nuns live longest of all.
================================================== ===========A couple got married, where the groom was 91 and the bride was
23. The groom looked pretty feeble and had the feeling that the
wedding night might kill him, because his bride was a healthy,
vivacious young woman.
But, the next morning, the bride came down the main staircase
slowly, step by step, hanging onto the banister.
She finally managed to get to the counter of the little shop
in the hotel where their honeymoon happened.
The clerk looked really concerned,
"What happened to you, honey?
You look like you've been wrestling an alligator!"
The bride groaned, hung on to the counter and managed to speak,
"Ohhh G-d! He told me he'd been saving up for 72 years,
and I thought he meant his money."
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Blue Smile Gag
http://www.goofyfun.com/1/bluesmile.htm
(LOL Very Cute Hun!)
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An elderly couple who were childhood sweethearts had married, settled down in their old neighborhood and were celebrating their
fiftieth wedding anniversary. They walked down the street to their old school.
There, they held hands as they found the old desk they had shared and where he had carved "I love you, Sally." On their way back home,
an armored car passes by and a bag of money falls practically at their feet. Sally quickly picks it up, but they don't know what to do
with it so they take it home. When they arrive home she counts the money, and it's fifty thousand dollars. The husband says, "We've
got to give it back."
Sally says, "Finders keepers." And she puts the money back in the bag and hides it up in their attic.
The next day, two FBI men who are going door-to-door in the neighborhood looking for the money show up at their home. They say,
"Pardon me, but did either of you find any money that fell out of an armored car yesterday?"
She says, "No."
The husband says, "She's lying. She hid it up in the attic."
She says, "Don't believe him, he's getting senile."
But the agents sit the man down and begin to question him. One says, "Tell us the story from the beginning."
The old man says, "Well, when Sally and I were walking home from school yesterday..."
The FBI agent looks at his partner and says, "We're done. Let's go."
================================================
A man and a little boy entered a barbershop together. After
the man received the full treatment - shave, shampoo, manicure,
haircut, etc. - he placed the boy in the chair. "I'm goin' to
buy a green tie to wear for the parade," he said. "I'll be
back in a few minutes."
When the boy's haircut was completed and the man still hadn't
returned, the barber said, "Looks like your daddy's forgotten
all about you."
"That wasn't my daddy," said the boy. "He just walked up, took
me by the hand and said, 'Come on, son, we're gonna get a free
haircut!'"
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What's the difference between driving in the fog and eating *****?
At least when you're eating ***** you can see the asshole in front
of you.
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Two Swedish housemaids are having their pictures taken.
The first one asks, "Why is he lookin' at us like that?"
The second replies, "He's got to focus."
"Oh no," says the first one, "you tell him he has to take the picture
first."
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What's black & white and tells the pope to **** OFF?
A nun that's just won the lottery.
Did you hear about the new course you can take at school?
Yes, Intercourse....you go between periods and you are expected to
come.
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The 15 year old girl is going on her first date, and her mother warns her not to let the boy put his hands up her dress. The girl agrees,
and the mother is reassured that her daughter will not let the boy put his hands up her dress.
The boy and girl go out, and after a movie and a nosh they are parked in lover's lane. He makes a move and tries to put his hands up her
dress. She stops him once, twice and three times. He's all disappointed.
Then she tells him why, "I promised my mother that I wouldn't let you put your hands up my dress. But, you can put your hands down the
back of my dress, and it's the second hole you come to!"
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SEX: The only activity where you start at the top and work your way
to the bottom, while getting a raise.
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Two weeks ago, after giving my lover the best analingus he ever had, he gasped how wonderful it was and that he came so hard he felt
some pain.
Six hours later, he called me from the emergency ward. Turns out that during that incredible orgasm, the pain he felt was the pull of a
groin muscle and one of his testicles had swollen to the size of a small orange.
He was out of work for two days and, only three days ago, was able to put away the cane he needed to walk with.
Today he told me he is still unable to masturbate, but he's still quite proud that I'm the only woman who has ever given him a sex injury.
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One day a man comes home from work to find total mayhem at home. The kids were outside still in their pajamas playing in the mud and
muck. There were empty food boxes and wrappers all around. As he proceeded into the house, he found an even bigger mess. Dishes on
the counter, dog food spilled on the floor, a broken glass under the table, and a small pile of sand by the back door.
The family room was strewn with toys and various items of clothing, and a lamp had been knocked over. He headed up the stairs, stepping
over toys, to look for his wife. He was becoming worried that she may be ill, or that something had happened to her.
He found her in the bedroom, still in bed with her pajamas on, reading a book. She looked up at him, smiled, and asked how his day went.
He looked at her bewildered and asked, "What happened here today?".
She again smiled and answered, "You know everyday when you come home from work and ask me what I did today?".
"Yes.", was his reply.
She answered, "Well, today I didn't do it!".
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