Not Ranked
The following are actual stories provided by a retiring Washington,
D.C.
Travel Agent of 30+ years:
I had a New Hampshire Congresswoman ask for an aisle seat so that her
hair
wouldn't get messed up by being near the window.
I got a call from a Candidate's Staffer, who wanted to go to Capetown.
I
started to explain the length of the flight and the passport
information
then she interrupted me with, "I'm not trying to make you look stupid,
but
Capetown is in Massachusetts." Without trying to make her look like the
stupid one, I calmly explained, "Cape Cod is in Massachusetts, Capetown
is
in Africa." Her response ... (click).
A Senior Vermont Congressman called, furious about a Florida package we
did.I asked what was wrong with the vacation in Orlando. He said he was
expecting an ocean-view room. I tried to explain that is not possible,
since
Orlando is in the middle of the state. He replied, "Don't lie to me. I
looked on the map, and Florida is a very thin state!!!"
I got a call from a Lawmakers Wife who asked, "Is it possible to see
England
from Canada?" I said, "No." She said, "But they look so close on the
map."
An Aide for a Bush cabinet member once called and asked if they could
rent a
car in Dallas. When I pulled up the reservation, I noticed they had
only a
1-hour layover in Dallas. When I asked him why he wanted to rent a
car,he
said, "I heard Dallas was a big airport, and we will need a car to
drive
between the gates to save time."
An Illinois Congresswoman called last week. She needed to know how it
was
possible that her flight from Detroit left at 8:20am and got into
Chicago at
8:33am. I tried to explain that Michigan was an hour ahead of Illinois,
but
she could not understand the concept of time zones. Finally, I told her
the
plane went very fast, and she bought that!
A New York lawmaker called and asked, "Do airlines put your physical
description on your bag so they know who's luggage belongs to who?" I
said,
"No, why do you ask?" She replied, "Well, when I checked in with the
airline, they put a tag on my luggage that said (FAT), and I'm
overweight, I
think that is very rude?" After putting her on hold for a minute while
I
"looked into it" (I was actually laughing) I came back and explained
the
city code for Fresno, CA is (FAT), and that the airline was just
putting a
destination tag on her luggage.
A Senator's Aide called in inquiring about a trip package to Hawaii.
After
going over all the cost info, she asked, "Would it be cheaper to fly to
California and then take the train to Hawaii?"
I just got off the phone with a freshman Congressman who asked, "How do
I
know which plane to get on?" I asked him what exactly he meant, to
which he
replied, "I was told my flight number is 823, but none of these darn
planes
have numbers on them."
A Lady Senator called and said, "I need to fly to Pepsi-Cola, FL. Do I
have
to get on one of those little computer planes?" I asked if she meant
fly to
Pensacola, FL on a commuter plane. She said, "Yeah, whatever!!"
A Senior Senator called and had a question about the documents he
needed in
order to fly to China. After a lengthy discussion about passports, I
reminded him he needed a visa. "Oh no I don't, I've been to China many
times
and never had to have one of those." I double checked and sure enough,
his
stay required a visa. When I told him this he said, "Look, I've been to
China four times and every time they have accepted my American
Express!"
A New Mexico Congresswoman called to make reservations, "I want to go
from
Chicago to Rhino, New York" The agent was at a loss for words. Finally,
the
agent: "Are you sure that's the name of the town?" "Yes, what flights
do you
have?" replied the lady. After some searching, the agent came back
with,
"I'm sorry, ma'am, I've looked up every airport code in the country and
can't find a Rhino anywhere." The lady retorted, "Oh don't be silly!
Everyone knows where it is. Check your map!" The agent scoured a map of
the
state of New York and finally offered, "You don't mean Buffalo, do
you?"
"That's it! I knew it was a big animal", she admitted!!!
Now you know why government is in the shape that it's in!
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