...actually....Wareham (pronounced "wear 'em" by REAL 'Capers) is most definitely On-shore and in fact, is NOT paht a Cape Cod at all---as so many of the habitants claim. You can tell if the Smith Bros. are "from away" or real Warehamites by asking them where their phoo-keen phactory is. If they say "Ware-HAM" they're immigrants (and probably illegal ones, too!)!
Bottom-feeders who persist in mispronouncing "Wareham" can be asked to pronounce the following Massachusetts towns:
-DedHAM (if mispronnounced "DeadHAM"---they're referring to a large chunk o' dead pig..., similarly:
-RaynHAM: pigs or pahts therefrom descending precipitously from the sky...
-ChatHAM: gossipy pigs
-EastHAM: an oriental pig
-StoneHAM: reefer-mad piggies
-WaltHAM: Up against the "wal", PIGS!
EVERY one of the above when pronounce in the Olde Newe Englande Mannere ends in a "'um"! As in: "They cahn't pronounce 'Wareham' propahly? Well, phu&$-um!!!!"
P.S. Take this down; it WILL be on to-morrow's quiz!!!!
