[bomelia]

An ugly man walks into his local pub with a big grin on his face.

"What are you so happy about?" asks the barman.

"Well, I'll tell you." replies the ugly man. "You know, I live by
the railway. Well, on my way home last night, I noticed a young
woman tied to the tracks, like in the films. I, of course, went and
cut her free and took her back to my place. Anyway, to make a long
story short, I scored big time! We made love all night, all over the
house. We did everything, me on top, sometimes her on top, every
position imaginable!"

"Fantastic!" exclaimed the bartender. "You lucky bastard. Was she
pretty?"

"Dunno... never found the head."