Not Ranked
Little Davie attended a horse auction with his father. He watched as his dad moved from horse to horse, running his hands up and down the horse’s legs, rump, and chest.
After a few minutes, Davie asks, “Dad, why are you doing that?” His father replied, “Because when I’m buying horses, I have to make sure that they are healthy and in good shape before I buy.
Davie, looking worried, said, “Dad, I think the UPS guy wants to buy Mom.”
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Tommy comes down to breakfast. Since they live on a farm, his mother asks if
he had done his chores. “Not yet,” said Tommy. His mother tells him no
breakfast until he does his chores. Well, he’s a little irritated, so he
goes to feed the chickens, and he kicks a chicken. He goes to feed the cows,
and he kicks a cow. He goes to feed the pigs, and he kicks a pig. He goes
back in for breakfast and his mother gives him a bowl of dry cereal.
“How come I don’t get any eggs and bacon? Why don’t I have any milk in my
cereal?” he asks.
“Well,” his mother says, “I saw you kick a chicken, so you don’t get any
eggs for a week. I saw you kick the pig, so you don’t get any bacon for a
week either. I also saw you kick the cow, so for a week you aren’t getting
any milk.”
Just then, his father comes down for breakfast and kicks the cat halfway
across the kitchen. Tommy looks up at his mother with a smile, and says,
“Are you going to tell him, or should I?
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