----1----
One day my housework-challenged husband decided to wash his Sweat-
shirt.
Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted to me, "What
setting do I use on the washing machine?"
"It depends," I replied. "What does it say on your shirt?"
He yelled back, " University of Oklahoma ".
And they say blondes are dumb...
----2----
A couple is lying in bed. The man says, "I am going to make you the
happiest woman in the world."
The woman replies, "I'll miss you..."
-----3----
"It's just too hot to wear clothes today," Jack says as he stepped out
of the shower, "honey, what do you think the neighbors would think if I
mowed the lawn like this?"
"Probably that I married you for your money," she replied.
-----4----
Q: What do you call an intelligent, good looking, sensitive man?
A: A rumor
-----5-----
A man and his wife, now in their 60's, were celebrating their 40th
wedding anniversary. On their special day a good fairy came to them and said
that because they had been so good that each one of them could have one wish.
The wife wished for a trip around the world with her husband. Whoosh!
Immediately she had airline and cruise tickets in her hands. The man
wished for a female companion 30 years younger... Whoosh...immediately he
turned ninety!!! Gotta love that fairy!
----6----
Dear Lord,
I pray for Wisdom to understand my man;
Love to forgive him;
And Patience for his moods.
Because, Lord, if I pray for Strength,
I'll beat him to death.
AMEN
----7----
Q: Why do little boys whine?
A: They are practicing to be men.
----8----
Q: What do you call a handcuffed man?
A: Trustworthy.
----9----
Q: What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and
calling your name?
A: You did not hold the pillow down long enough.
---10----
Q: Why do men whistle when they are sitting on the toilet?
A: It helps them remember which end they need to wipe.
----11----
Q: How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?
A: Rename the mail folder "Instruction Manuals"
Ron
