[cobra de capell]

Donation

Father O'Malley answers the phone. "Hello, is this Father O'Malley?"

"It is!"

"This is the IRS. Can you help us?"

"I can!"

"Do you know a Ted Houlihan?"

"I do!"

"Is he a member of your congregation?"

"He is!"

"Did he donate $10,000 to the church?"

"He will."
_____

A man went to his doctor and said, "Doc, I think I'm getting senile. Several times lately, I have forgotten to zip up."

"That's not senility," replied the doctor. "Senility is when you forget to zip down."