[cobra de capell]

A father, who worked away from home all week, always made a special effort with his family on the weekends. Every Sunday morning he would take his 7-year old daughter out for a drive in the car for some bonding time.

One particular Sunday however, he had a bad cold and he really didn't feel like being up at all. Luckily, his wife came to the rescue and said that she would take their daughter out. When they returned, the little girl anxiously ran upstairs to see her father.

"Well," the father asked, "did you enjoy your ride with mommy?"

"Oh yes, Daddy" the girl replied, "and do you know what? We didn't see a single dumb b####rd or lousy s##t head!"
_____

Understood only in Texas

The Texas state public education system cannot seem to adopt a statewide test that they use for more than 5 years. School districts statewide have used the following tests: TABS, TEAMS, TAAS, and now TAKS.

Therefore, the Laredo Independent school district has adopted a test that better fits the public education in our city. The new instrument will be the TEXAS ASSESSMENT OF COGNITIVE OPERATIONS (TACO).

It will have a remedial version (Soft TACO), a regular version (Hard TACO), and an advanced version with many more pages (the Gordita.) It will be graded on the standard bell curve (the TACO Bell).

Districts receiving the lowest scores will be put on probation with a Basic Educational Appraisal-Not Satisfactory (BEANS).

A second low rating earns the dreaded Supplement Remediation Factor for Individualized Education Deficits (REFRIED BEANS).

These ratings are expected to cause a lot of hot air at campus faculty meetings.