Thread: Jokes
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Old 03-26-2009, 09:58 AM
cobra de capell cobra de capell is offline
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This rich Frenchman had a butler. The butler was excellent in every way, but he was a staunch communist. This bothered the rich Frenchman somewhat, but he dealt with it.

As part of their employment agreement, the butler had every Tuesday night off to attend Communist Party meetings.

One Tuesday night, the butler’s employer saw the light burning in the butler’s room. Thinking something might be wrong with him, he went up to investigate.

The butler answered the door in his slippers, newspaper in hand, looking perfectly well.

“Why aren’t you at the communist party meeting tonight?”

“Because at the last meeting, it was proven that if all the wealth in France were equally divided, everyone would have four thousand francs”.

“So?” says the rich guy?

Replies the butler: “Well... I have FIVE thousand francs.”
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The old priest lay dying in the hospital. For years He had faithfully served the people of the nation's capital. He motioned for his nurse to come near.

"Yes, Father?" said the nurse.

"I would really like to see Harry Reid and Nancy Pelosi before I die", whispered the priest.

"I'll see what I can do, Father" replied the nurse.

The nurse sent the request to them and waited for a response. Soon the word arrived. Harry and Nancy would be delighted to visit the priest. As they went to the hospital, Harry commented to Nancy "I don't know why the old priest wants to see us, but it will certainly help our images." Nancy couldn't help but agree.

When they arrived at the priest's room, the priest took Nancy ¹s hand in his right hand and Harry¹s hand in his left. There was silence and a look of serenity on the old priest's face.

Finally Nancy spoke.

"Father, of all the people you could have chosen, why did you choose us to be with you as you near the end?"

The old priest slowly replied "I have always tried to pattern my life after our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ."

The old priest continued...

"He died between two lying thieves. I would like to do the same."
_____

There was an engineer, manager and programmer driving down a steep mountain road.

The brakes failed and the car careened down the road out of control.

Half way down the driver managed to stop the car by running it against the embankment narrowing avoiding going over a cliff.

They all got out, shaken by their narrow escape from death, but otherwise unharmed.

The manager said "To fix this problem we need to organize a committee, have meetings, and through a process of continuous improvement, develop a solution."

The engineer said "No that would take too long, and besides that method never worked before. I have my trusty pen knife here and will take apart the brake system, isolate the problem and correct it."

The programmer said "I think you're both wrong! I think we should all push the car back up the hill and see if it happens again."
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