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In Texas, a woman was called in front of a grand jury for possible manslaughter charges after she shot a mugger in the back six times as he was running away with her purse. He had grabbed her purse and ran. She had her hand on her gun inside the purse and when he ran with the purse she was left holding just the gun.
When asked by the grand jury why she shot him six times, in the back as he was running, under oath she replied "Because when I pulled the trigger the 7th time, it only went click."
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Why did the caveman pull their women around by the hair?
Cuz, if they pulled them around by the leg, they would fill up with sand.
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A guy walks into the bedroom carrying a sheep in his arms and says, "Honey, this is the cow I make love to when you have a headache."
The wife, laying in the bed reading a book, looks up and says, "If you weren't such an idiot, you'd know that's a sheep, not a cow."
The guy replies, "If you weren't such a presumptuous b*tch, you'd realize I was talking to the sheep."
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