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ATTENTION - ROADS CLOSED THIS WEEKEND
For those of you who might be considering a road trip, be advised:
Portions of I-64, I-70, I-29 & I-90 will be closed this weekend
Expect long delays along these interstate highways plus major traffic
disruptions in Charleston, WV, Louisville, KY, St Louis, MO, Kansas City, MO, and Omaha, NE. A 500-ton piece of coal is being moved from West Virginia to South Dakota so that Barack H. Obama can be added to Mt. Rushmore.
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A Cowboy walked into a drug store in west Texas and asked to talk to a male pharmacist. The woman he was talking to said that she was the only pharmacist and as she and her sister owned the store, there were no males employed there. She then asked if she could help him.
The cowpoke said that it was something that he would be much more comfortable discussing with a male pharmacist.
The female pharmacist assured him that she was completely professional and whatever it was that he needed to discuss, he could be confident that she would treat him with the highest level of professionalism.
The cowboy then agreed and began by saying, ‘This is tough for me to discuss, but I have a permanent erection. It causes me a lot of problems and severe embarrassment, and I was wondering what you could give me for it.’
The pharmacist said, ‘Just a minute, I’ll talk to my sister.’ When she returned, she said, We discussed it at length and the absolute best we can do is as follows:
1/3 ownership in the store,
A company pickup truck, and
$3,000 a month living expenses.
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young Barack Obama and Michele were laying in bed after their first date — which ended up with them making passionite love for hours.
As they were relaxing, Barack just had to scratch his balls, so he tried to hide it.
“Oh, don’t hide, Barack,” said Michele. “I love to see a man scratch his balls.”
Really?” exclaimed a suprised Barck. “You like to see me scratch my balls?”
“Yeah,” cooed Michele. “I really miss mine.”
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One day, with a sudden flash and the smell of sulfur, the Devil appeared in Senator Harry Reid’s office.
The Devil said, “I will give you money, power, the ability to impose your will on others, but you must give me your immortal soul and work for the domination of Evil over the world and the oppression on men.”
Senator Reid thought for a moment, then said, “Wait a minute! What’s the catch?”
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What do Miley Cyrus and Barack Obama have in common?
They both attract young people with mindless verses.
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