[cobra de capell]

A local lawyer was sitting in his office the other morning when in walked a beautiful blonde lady.

Without any preliminaries she said she wanted a divorce.

"On what grounds?" asked the lawyer. "I don't think he is faithful to me," she replied.

"And what makes you think he isn't faithful?" asked the lawyer.

"Well," replied the young lady, "I don't think he is the father of my child."
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At a dinner party the host’s kid was a complete distraction racing around and making noise to the point one guest said, “ I have experience with kids his age. May I take him upstairs?”

The host agreed and the two went upstairs and, after the guest returned, the entire evening was quiet. The host asked how did the guest do this when all his attempts met with failure.

The guest said, “Easy. I taught him to masturbate.”
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The Pope was getting into his limo one night when he turned to the limo driver and said,
"Before I die, I would love to drive this beautiful limo just once."

"Well, here," the limo driver says, "Take the wheel, Your Holiness!"

Further down the road, the limo is stopped by a policeman who looks in the window,
goes back to his squad car, calls dispatch and says, "I just pulled over someone real important
and I don't know what to do."

"Well, who is it?" his dispatcher says, "The mayor? The governor? The president?"

"I don't know," the officer responds, "but the Pope's his chauffer!"
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