[CobraDan]

On those days when things are going really bad for you think of this poor guy.
Are you having a bad day at the office? If so, read the following and have a laugh.
Rob is a commercial saturation diver for Global Divers in Louisiana. He performs underwater repairs on offshore drilling rigs. Below is an e-mail he sent his sister. She then sent it to Laughline, who was sponsoring a
"worst job experience" contest. Needless to say, she won.
Here's how it went:
Hi Sue,
Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother. Last week I had a bad day at the office. I know you've been feeling down lately at work, so I thought I would share my dilemma with you to make you realize it's not
so bad after all. Before I can tell you what happened to me, I first must bore you with a few technicalities of my job. As you know, my office lies at the bottom of the sea. I wear a suit to the office. It's a wet suit.
This time of year the water is quite cool. So what we do to keep warm is this: We have a diesel powered industrial water heater. This $20,000 piece of crap sucks the water out of the sea, heats it to a delightful temperature, and then pumps it down to the diver through a garden hose, which is taped to the air hose. Now this sounds like a damn good plan,
and I've used it several times with no complaints. When I get to the bottom
and start working, I take the hose and stuff it down the back of my wet suit, which floods my whole suit with warm water. It's like working in a Jacuzzi.
Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my butt started to itch. So, of course, I scratched it. This only made things worse. Within a seconds, my butt started to burn. I pulled the hose out from my back, but
the damage was done. In agony, I realized what had happened. The hot water machine had sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it into my wet suit.
Now since I don't have any hair on my back, the jellyfish couldn't stick to it. However, the crack of my butt was not as fortunate. When I
scratched what I thought was a regular itch, I was actually grinding the jellyfish into my butt. I informed the dive supervisor of my dilemma
over the communicator. His instructions were unclear due to the fact that he,along with 5 other divers, were all laughing hysterically. Needless to say, I aborted the dive.
I was instructed to make 3 agonizing in-water decompression stops (totaling 35 minutes) before I could reach the surface to begin my
chamber dry decompression. When I arrived at the surface, I was wearing nothing but my brass helmet. As I climbed out of the water, the medic, with tears of laughter running down his face, handed me a tube of cream and told me to rub it on my butt as soon as I got in the chamber. The cream put the fire out, but I couldn't crap for 2 days because my butthole was swollen shut. So, the next time you think you're having a bad day at work, think
about how much worse it would be if you had a jellyfish shoved up your butt.