My mother passed away

[NVJoker]

April 22nd. On the day that she passed away I was able to tell her I loved her and she told me the same back. 30 minutes later she became non responsive after they upped her morphine. The cancer was very aggressive and had made it into her bone morrow in her spine. The regular doses of morphine were not working. She was also battling a colitis infection.

I believe she was hanging on until I came to Phoenix. She did not tell me until I got here she hadn't eaten in at least 5 days and was at the point of where she could not even keep sips of water down. I cannot express how upsetting it is to hear and see your mother in pain to where she is crying.

She made it clear long ago that she was never to be put on a ventilator. The doctors wanted to do this to try to beat the infection. If she beat the infection then she got to look forward of months of agonizing pain while the cancer consumed her spine and not her vital organs. I made the decision to honor her wishes and to have them give her more morphine and quit poking her and pumping her full of medicine just to keep her blood pressure up.

She was a Christian and I left it to her God to deliver her. I feel fortunate enough to have been able to tell her how proud of her I was of her as my mother and to say goodbye while she was still responsive. She was a beautiful woman inside and out and she sacrificed so much for me and my sister. The day before her passing she told me in the hospital she was retiring on July 1st and said she would never see it and she started crying.

In one our heart to heart talks prior to this we talked about her wishes being honored. She said she didn't have much but what she did have she worked hard for and earned. She wanted her life to be celebrated and what she left behind be applied as a gift. She did not want her gift to be used to pay bills. She wanted to be remembered.

Some of you might know that the Spec Racer is the gift that my father left for me after his passing. It was his final gift to me you might say. In finishing the Spec Racer I will also have some of my mother's gift as well. Every time I drive it, I will remember my father and mother with a smile.

Her grandson that is in Afghanistan (2nd tour) does not know it yet but he will have a gift from grandma applied towards his first home purchase.

There is more but no need to ramble on. She will be remembered and celebrated many times over from her family.

[csx4910]

My thoughts and prayers go out to you and your family. Although this might not help, As someone who spent 15 years putting people on the ventilator (Working as a Respiratory Therapist in the ICU and Trauma rooms) and sadly, having to take them off when they pass, she is in a much better world than the life she would of had trying to fight on the vent. So many families go against their loved ones wishes in this situation and it never failed that it ended much worse and less peaceful than following their wishes. In my humble opinion, you did the right thing and your mother is smiling down upon you right now from heaven.
Hang in There
Ron

[stefanog]

My prayers go out to you and your family my friend. A very difficult time indeed. Great knowing you got to tell her you loved her.

Stef

[PurpleVenom]

Condolences to you and your family. I lost my Mom earlier this year. Although it was very very hard, I've realized how much pain she was in and how her quality of life had decreased so much that life was not enjoyable. She to held on long enough for my sister to arrive in town before she passed. She, and I, had always been afraid that she would die alone in her sleep at the nursing home. My sister and I were in the room when she passed. As sad as it is seeing a loved one, especially your mom pass on, how happy you must be knowing she isn't in pain anymore. I decided to celebrate her life at the services and there were smiles and tears, but all knew she was better now. Hope this helps. Time does heal the pain.

Thoughts and prayers,
Tim

[rbray]

I'm sorry for you loss

[onefast5.0]

Very sorry for your loss!My familys thoughts and prayers are with you

[twobjshelbys]

We are very sorry to hear this. Our thoughts are with you and your family.

[PatBuckley]

Wow! That is totally awesome! I take it her gift is going to be a new engine? Cool.

What are the specs?

[SJK2]

Very sorry for your loss our familys thoughts and prayers are with you

[NVJoker]

Originally Posted by PatBuckley

Wow! That is totally awesome! I take it her gift is going to be a new engine? Cool.

What are the specs?

That will be a seperate thread.

[blykins]

I'm sorry to hear about your loss. I think you did the right thing in honoring her wishes and not prolonging the suffering.

[vettestr]

Hey Jason, You are in my thoughts and will be thinking good things for you.
Jeff and Cathy

[Juggernaut]

Very sorry to about you & your family's loss. Although this is a very difficult time for you, her suffering is over and she is at peace with the Lord.

[Bob Broberg SPF667 460BB]

Jason, our family will pray for your, and your sister's comfort in this difficult time.

AZ Bob

[dave from mesa]

Judy and I send our condolences. She is in a better place now. Best of luck in these difficult times

[Fitz]

Parants and a son's Mother are always special. I will say a prayer for both your parants.

[Karl Bebout]

Jason, unfortunately, most of us have to go through the loss of our parents and its a really tough part of life. The passage of time will help, but maybe the best you can do is remember the good times and the love you had for each other. My sympathies.

[Danr55]

My condolences for your loss. Moms are always special.

[mikiec]

Jason,

I just read this. Sorry for your loss. At least you both were able to express your feelings one last time.

Ginny and I send our warmest regards. Hope to see you soon.

In honor of your Mom, I'll dispense with the Funnel Boy term for 30 days.

Mike

[tan man]

Jason my condolence to you. my thought and prayers go out to you and your family, and thanks for sharing with us part of your private life Stuart