Joke of the Day...

[bonyhadi]

Turn up your volume for these...

Granny Boobs Hang Low

Click here: http://www.debsfunpages.com/swf4/boobs_hang_low.swf


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http://people.freenet.de/freeek/SajjadAli.swf
This link came to me with a note that said to turn the volume up
way loud because the site is pretty quiet. I will tell you right now,
this scared the **** out of me. It about knocked me out of my chair.
So, if you're game for a thrill, turn your volume up and click.

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A modern Orthodox Jewish couple, preparing for a religious wedding meet with their rabbi for counseling. The rabbi asks
if they have any last questions before they leave.

The man asks, "Rabbi, we realize it's tradition for men to dance with men, and women to dance with women at the
reception. But, we'd like your permission to dance together."

"Absolutely not," says the rabbi. "It's immodest. Men and women always dance separately."

"So after the ceremony, I can't even dance with my own wife?"

"No," answered the rabbi. "It's forbidden."

Well, okay," says the man. "What about sex? Can we finally have sex?" "Of course!" replies the rabbi. "Sex is a mitzvah
[good deed) within marriage, to have children!"

"What about different positions?" asks the man.

"No problem," says the rabbi. "It's a mitzvah!"

"Woman on top?" the man asks.

"Sure," says the rabbi. "Go for it! It's a mitzvah!"

"Doggy style?" "Sure!" says the rabbi. "Another mitzvah!"

"On the kitchen table?" "Yes, yes!" says the rabbi. "A mitzvah!"

"Can we do it on rubber sheets with a bottle of hot oil, a couple of vibrators, a leather harness, a bucket of honey and a
porno video?"

"You may indeed. It's all a mitzvah!"

"Can we do it standing up?" "NO, NO, NO!" cries the rabbi."

"Why not?" asks the man.

"Could lead to dancing."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Important Information for Women;

Discover the Benefits of Worshiping ...
And Adoring Your Man's Penis

Every blowjob you give, adds one month to your life.

If you swallow, the protein ingested is equivalent to five porterhouse
steaks but contains only 150 calories.

A handjob a day keeps arthritis away.

Every ten minutes of dry humping is equivalent to ten minutes on the
treadmill.

Doing it doggie-style will erase crow's feet and wrinkles.

Intercourse prevents divorce.

Regular ****ing releases Vitamin F, which increases the number of brain
cells.

Sex eliminates headaches.

Obeying the Eleventh Commandment, "Thou shalt make thy man hard,"
triples your chances of getting into heaven.

Inviting an attractive female friend into bed with you and your lover
earns you a diamond choker for your birthday.
================================================== ===========

Worth a chuckle!! Jew Crush'? Real-life Gidget Rides a New
Wave of Fame



FORWARD STAFF
With the opening this month of "Blue Crush" â€1 a Universal Studios film about women surfers â€1
countless reviewers have cried, "move over, Gidget!"
But the woman who inspired it all, the real Gidget, Kathy Kohner Zuckerman, is anything but ready to
throw in the towel. In fact, as the 61-year-old told the Forward at the start of her interview, "I'm ready to
rock and roll!"
Indeed, with women's surfing hotter than ever, Zuckerman has many reasons to rock. The 1957 book that
started it all, "Gidget," by Zuckerman's father, Frederick Kohner, is currently in its second printing since its
reissue in 2001. The 1965 ABC series "Gidget" â€1 which launched Sally Field's career â€1 is currently in
reruns on TV Land, garnering nearly 500,000 viewers five days a week.
"What's exciting for me is that there's interest in the character," Zuckerman said affably.
Still, when most people think "Gidget," they think sun, sand and virginity â€1 in other words, Sandra Dee,
who played the surfer girl in the 1959 movie. Most don't know that Gidget was based on a true story â€1
the story of a young Jewish girl who spent her tender teenage years learning how to "hang ten" and be
one of the boys.
Zuckerman was born in Los Angeles in 1941, the daughter of Czechoslovakian parents who had been living
in Berlin. Frederick Kohner, a screenwriter, and his wife, Fritzie, left Nazi Germany in 1936, first living in
London and later arriving in California, where Kohner wrote screenplays for the major Hollywood studios.
"I really had a great upbringing," Zuckerman recalled, noting that then-recent horrors in Europe did not
touch her life in sunny Southern California. "In retrospect, a lot of my parents' friends were of the same ilk
â€1 I wouldn't use the term refugees. They were in the movie business, my father's brother was in the
movie business, their friends were in the movie business."
Although the family celebrated Christmas and Easter, "I knew I was Jewish," she said.
In 1954, the family moved back to Berlin for two years. When Zuckerman returned to California at age 15,
she had trouble relating to her peers. "One of the reasons I ventured into the surfing world was that
people had this weird vision: 'Europe? Where's that?'" she said.
Plus, "I always grew up with the idea that the beach and the sun is good for you," Zuckerman said. "When
I came back from Germany, my mother thought I should not spend Saturday afternoons at the movie
theater with the girls, I should go to the beach."
It was there that Zuckerman found her home. She was enthralled by the surfing culture â€1 and the young
men with names such as Mysto, Steak and Moondoggie. "That's when I decided I was going to surf," she
said. "This is it, this is what I wanted to do. It consumed me. I kept a diary, and every day seemed about
the beach."
Soon Zuckerman was known at the beach as Gidget â€1 a combination of "girl" and "midget," thanks to
her petite frame â€1 and was recounting stories of her summertime adventures to her father. "I said I
wanted to write a story about what's going on at Malibu," she recalled. "He said, 'Why don't you tell me,
and I'll write the story for you.' He wrote a great story; he embellished it for a certain charm and dramatic
purpose. I was able to capture the language in my diary â€1 'today was *****en'' or 'the surf was up' â€1
but he created a story."
Kohner wrote "Gidget" in six weeks. It became a best-seller. "Gidget" the movie spawned countless sequels
and imitators ("Gidget Must Die: A Killer Surf Novel," a not atypical title) as surfing became a national
phenomenon.
By that time, however, Zuckerman had stopped riding the waves. "The summer of 1960 was the last time I
went surfing," she said. "It was a combination of reasons. Malibu got very crowded. The fellas I had spent
time with had moved on â€1 some to military service. Perhaps it was a rite of passage for me in my years
of angst, 15 to 18, when I was becoming a woman. I was able to slide â€1 no pun intended â€1 through
the years of passage to adulthood."
In 1965, Zuckerman married Marvin Zuckerman, a professor of Yiddish and now retired dean of Los
Angeles Valley College. "With my husband I learned Yiddish culture, a whole area of Yiddishkeyt, Jewish
things that I was not aware of." The couple has two grown sons and two granddaughters.
Today, Zuckerman works at Duke's, a Malibu restaurant named after the "father of surfing," the Hawaiian
legend Duke Kahanamoku. She is an honorary member of the Malibu Surfing Association (as well as a
dues-paying member of Kehillat Israel, a Reconstructionist synagogue in Pacific Palisades) and has been
honored in countless surfing magazines.
"I hate to think of myself as a legend," Zuckerman said, adding, "Now I'm grandma Gidget. Cowabunga!"
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