New, New Chat Thread

[Ron61]

I received this from a person in canada that works on a Ferry Boat. Thought it may make Joe feel better as he has to work.

NEW OFFICE POLICY

Dress Code:
1) You are advised to come to work dressed according to your salary.

2) If we see you wearing Prada shoes and carrying a Gucci bag, we will assume you are doing well financially and therefore do not need a raise.

3) If you dress poorly, you need to learn to manage your money better, so that you may buy nicer clothes, and therefore you do not need a raise.

4) If you dress just right, you are right where you need to be and therefore you do not need a raise.

Sick Days:
We will no longer accept a doctor's statement as proof of sickness. If you are able to go to the doctor, you are able to come to work.

Personal Days:
Each employee will receive 104 personal days a year. They are called Saturdays & Sundays.

Bereavement Leave:
This is no excuse for missing work. There is nothing you can do for dead friends, relatives or co-workers. Every effort should be made to have non-employees attend the funeral arrangements in your place. In rare cases where employee involvement is necessary, the funeral should be scheduled in the late afternoon. We will be glad to allow you to work through your lunch hour and subsequently leave one hour early.

Bathroom Breaks:
Entirely too much time is being spent in the toilet. There is now a strict three-minute time limit in the stalls. At the end of three minutes, an alarm will sound, the toilet paper roll will retract, the stall door will open, and a picture will be taken. After your second offense, your picture will be posted on the company bulletin board under the 'Chronic Offenders' category. Anyone caught smiling in the picture will be sectioned under the company's mental health policy.

Lunch Break:
* Skinny people get 30 minutes for lunch, as they need to eat more, so that they can look healthy.
* Normal size people get 15 minutes for lunch to get a balanced meal to maintain their average figure.
* Chubby people get 5 minutes for lunch, because that's all the time needed to drink a Slim-Fast.

Thank you for your loyalty to our company. We are here to provide a positive employment experience. Therefore, all questions, comments, concerns, complaints, frustrations, irritations, aggravations, insinuations, allegations, accusations, contemplations, consternation
and input should be directed elsewhere.

The Management

Ron

[Joe Wicked]

Ron,
It sounds like our HR department wrote it.

[wtm442]

GMW

Boy what a nice ride yesterday evening. Fantastic weather ... even had to put on a jacket on the ride home at about 8PM because the temp got down to 64°F. I had to turn off the fan in the window last night when the temp dipped down below 50°F.



Forecast is for 5 days in a row with sunny skies and max temp of 80°F. Oh boy. This is my kind of weather.

[Ron61]

Nice picture Warren. Enjoy the weather now as it won't last long and this Winter you are really going to get it. You had best bring Turtle inside for the Winter also.

Also the past couple of days our temperature here has been well below the normal for this time of year. But the last forecast I saw was for another dry Winter here.

Ron

[Ron61]

They Just Won't Give Up!!!! New Name For Vista.

http://tech.yahoo.com/blogs/null/99553

Ron

[Joe Wicked]

Typical Microshaft.

heavy rains this morning. Streets are flooded and several highway closures from wrecks and from flash flooding. Had a few close lightning strikes on my way in to work. One was so bright and loud that I was momentarily blinded and deaf. My ears were ringing for about 30 min after that. Pretty scary when you are driving 35MPH and all you can see is pure white. Not knowing if those around you are slamming on brakes or what. I just lifted and coasted. At that point if I was going to get into a wreck, I knew there was nothing I could do about it, so I tired to relax my body. Luckily it only lasted about a second or 2, but it seemed to last forever.

[trularin]

Joe, do you need a boat?

Warren, as usual, the picture is good. I have to ask, do you have any stone chips in your paint?

[4RE KLR]

Boy the rain has sure knocked the temp down here. It is pleasant outside.

Spending some time with the kids today.

[Ron61]

Great day so far here. Just got home from the dentist and have to have a crown made. Thank God it is not a Gold one as they cost about $300 more. The bill for this one was $673 dollars. And whatever medicine he used this time has really had an effect on me. I feel almost as if I am going to pass out and have no energy at all and the medicine has had 2 hours to wear off. Darn old teeth anyway. Then Doug sits and tells me about all the cars his son is collecting and Lorrie had to come in and inform me that her husband had just bought the 1980 Corvette of his dreams. And there I lay so drugged I can't even get out of the chair without help.
But on the way out I saw a beautiful Triumph TR-4 Convertible that looked brand new. Man was that a beautiful car. I wish the owner had been there as I would have loved to talk to him about it. I am sure it was turbo charged as it had the small hump in the hood. Closest I ever in my life came to wanting to steal a car.

Ron

[trularin]

Gee Ron, didn't you realize that Cobra was going to cause this need to keep up with you?

1980 corvette????

Well, I hope the crown is right in aspects when they install it.

[Ron61]

Tru,

Since I no longer have the Cobra, they aren't trying to keep up with me. I did talk to Bill today and he has found where he left the Coupe 8 months ago.

They had to close one of the big parking lots down in Redding or at least one end of it. It is a double decker that covers 3 blocks and concrete is falling from the top deck at an expansion joint. Just 2 years ago people reported cracks in it and the city Engineers, (Insert Laughter here), checked it out and said it would last at least another 20 years before needing any work. They must be some that worked on Warren's tunnel back there.

The 1980 Corvette is in excellent condition from what all of them told me. It has been taken great care of and all they had to do was charge the battery. I haven't seen it yet but will try to get over and look at it once they get the new worn off. Maybe pick up any unneeded parts that fall off.

Ron

[392cobra]

Originally Posted by Ron61

Great day so far here. Just got home from the dentist and have to have a crown made. Thank God it is not a Gold one as they cost about $300 more. The bill for this one was $673 dollars. And whatever medicine he used this time has really had an effect on me. I feel almost as if I am going to pass out and have no energy at all and the medicine has had 2 hours to wear off. Darn old teeth anyway.
Ron

Geez Ron !
Did I miss your call for my dental help ???

[Ron61]

Fred,

You caused it. Looking at those pictures of Biker Babe were just more than my poor old teeth could take. The first picture I saw, when my jaw dropped open 3 teeth fell out.

Ron

[392cobra]

Speaking of BB...We are having something of a disagreement lately.

She settled in on the back of my Road King,after her spending the day at a all you can eat buffet.

She leans forward and says she thinks my Harley makes her butt look big.

[wtm442]

Anything except total darkness would make BB's butt look big!

Ron, you got off cheap. My bridge needs to be replaced. One of the two teeth is realy bad and I need to have a root canal and post (if possible ... if not, a $3500 implant).

Great day today ... and I did not even go for a ride!

Tru - I have the 3M clear shield on the Cobra, so I do NOT have any rock chips in the paint after 14K miles. Of course, I do have two small little scratches that I put in the paint.

Oh, and the bottom edge of the fiberglass under the oil cooler has a couple of scrapes. If you are less than 6 inches tall, you can see them. Courtesy of a f*#&ing cement curb in a parking lot.

Fred - have to go and get the baby back ribs and fresh corn on the cob. Its done in 5 minutes. Ummmmmmm gud!

[trularin]

Tomorrow I understand they start letting people go.

I am not sure I will be able to sleep.

3M shield...I'll keep that in mind.

[392cobra]

Tru,
I had it installed on my WRX STi 5 years ago next week when I bought the car.
Nothing has come close to damaging it yet.

Here is a link to the 3M site and their product.


http://www.invincaman.com/

Welcome to Invincaman.com, the home of the invisible autobra!


3M SCOTCHGARD™ Paint Protective film is designed to protect and maintain the finish of all automobiles. The tough urethane base combined with the sleek high gloss appearance provides an invisible shield against the elements of the road.

There is no need to hide your vehicle behind the bulky leather bra's or plastic bug shields of yesterday. Our kits are computer designed for an exact fit to your vehicle and are warranted against manufacturing defects, including cracking or yellowing.

Whether you are wanting to preserve the finish of a classic or new vehicle, Invincaman has the protection you need.

Mission Statement
Our Company goal is to provide the most outstanding, professional and quality installation available; and to provide excellent customer satisfaction.

[wtm442]

I hope you still have a job Tru. Good luck today!
Been there ... done that.

The original owner of my SPF had the 3M shield installed professionally by a shop close to the SPF dealer (Olthoff Racing in North Carolina). It cost about $450 installed. Cost to have it done by a shop is probably about $550 to $700 now.

See if they make a pre-cut version for your Lone Star Cobra. If not, they sell sheets and you have to cut it. Not an easy job if you have to cut the pieces yourself.

[Ron61]

GMW,

Boy, did that medicine at the dentist really knock me for a loop yesterday. I barely made it home before I passed out and I spent the whole day in bed more or less conscious. Never had that happen before and I am going to call today and ask if he has changed brands or anything. I feel better this morning but weak.

Tru,

Good luck. I hope that you still have a job after today. Darn it will be hard for you to post from China when they outsource stuff there and send you over there. But hang in there and things will get better.



Ron

[wtm442]

Originally Posted by Ron61

I spent the whole day in bed more or less conscious. Ron

Its a lot better if you are less conscious. And some of your posts prove that theory.