New, New Chat Thread - Page 114

392cobra · #**2261** (**permalink**) 12-19-2006, 05:43 PM

It is a '01 Ford Taurus SES.Metalic Red (of course

)w/leather interior.
Got it from Sam Pack Ford. Talked with Jay this morning and he gave me the Manager's name.Of course he knows Jay and Gary S.Gave me a good deal on it.It was the salesman's personal car that he bought new from Sam.
It looks new in & out.

This is the actual car.

http://cars.kbb.com/go/search/detail...&aff=carskbb#0

Ibr8k4vetts · #**2262** (**permalink**) 12-19-2006, 08:34 PM

Gift Wrapping Tips for Men
This is the time of year when we think back to the very
first Christmas, when the Three Wise Men... Gaspar,
Balthazar, and Herb who went to see the baby Jesus and,
according to the Book of Matthew, "presented unto Him gifts;
gold, frankincense, and myrrh."

These are simple words, but if we analyze them carefully, we
discover an important, yet often overlooked, theological
fact: there is no mention of wrapping paper.

If there had been wrapping paper, Matthew would have said
so: "And lo, the gifts were inside 600 square cubits of
paper. And the paper was festooned with pictures of Frosty
the Snowman. And Joseph was going to throweth it away, but
Mary saideth unto him, she saideth, 'Holdeth it! That is
nice paper! Saveth it for next year!' And Joseph did rolleth
his eyeballs. And the baby Jesus was more interested in the
paper than the frankincense."

But these words do not appear in the Bible, which means that
the very first Christmas gifts were NOT wrapped. This is
because the people giving those gifts had two important
characteristics:

1. They were wise.
2. They were men.

Men are not big gift wrappers. Men do not understand the
point of putting paper on a gift just so somebody else can
tear it off. This is not just my opinion, this is a
scientific fact based on a statistical survey of two guys I
know. One is Rob, who said the only time he ever wraps a
gift is "if it's such a poor gift that I don't want to be
there when the person opens it." The other is Gene, who told
me he does wrap gifts, but as a matter of principle never
takes more than 15 seconds per gift. "No one ever had to
wonder which presents daddy wrapped at Christmas," Gene
said. "They were the ones that looked like enormous
spitballs."

I also wrap gifts, but because of some defect in my motor
skills, I can never completely wrap them. I can take a gift
the size of a deck of cards and put it the exact center of a
piece of wrapping paper the size of a regulation volleyball
court, but when I am done folding and taping, you can still
see a sector of the gift peeking out. (Sometimes I
camouflage this sector with a marking pen.) If I had been an
ancient Egyptian in the field of mummies, the lower half of
the Pharaoh's body would be covered only by Scotch tape.

On the other hand, if you give my wife a 12-inch square of
wrapping paper, she can wrap a C-130 cargo plane. My wife,
like many women, actually likes wrapping things. If she
gives you a gift that requires batteries, she wraps the
batteries separately, which to me is very close to being a
symptom of mental illness. If it were possible, my wife
would wrap each individual volt.

My point is that gift-wrapping is one of those skills like
having babies that come more naturally to women than to men.
That is why today I am presenting:

Gift Wrapping Tips for Men:

* Whenever possible, buy gifts that are already wrapped. If,
when the recipient opens the gift, neither one of you
recognizes it, you can claim that it's myrrh.

* The editors of Woman's Day magazine recently ran an item
on how to make your own wrapping paper by printing a design
on it with an apple sliced in half horizontally and dipped
in a mixture of food coloring and liquid starch. They must
be smoking crack. If you're giving a hard-to-wrap gift, skip
the wrapping paper! Just put it inside a bag and stick one
of those little adhesive bows on it. This creates a festive
visual effect that is sure to delight the lucky recipient on
Christmas morning:

YOUR WIFE: Why is there a Hefty trash bag under the tree?
YOU: It's a gift! See? It has a bow!
YOUR WIFE (peering into the trash bag): It's a leaf blower.
YOU: Gas-powered! Five horsepower!
YOUR WIFE: I want a divorce.
YOU: I also got you some myrrh.

In conclusion, remember that the important thing is not what
you give, or how you wrap it. The important thing, during
this very special time of year, is that you save the
receipt.

Author Unknown (but definitely male)

wtm442 · #**2263** (**permalink**) 12-19-2006, 08:51 PM

Fred
If you adopt me, will you buy me a car? Or at least a mini-Cobra for my turtle? Nice gift. I wish my father had enough money to buy me a car when I was a teenager. But those coal powered cars were expensive

Temp down to 25 ºF. Thats fall weather for Tru.

wtm442 · #**2264** (**permalink**) 12-19-2006, 08:55 PM

On the other hand, if you give my wife a 12-inch square of
wrapping paper, she can wrap a C-130 cargo plane.

LMAO - Ain't that the truth

Ron61 · #**2265** (**permalink**) 12-20-2006, 06:33 AM

Dentist this morning and you guys are having all of the fun. Birthday Saturday and I am going to stay home, lock the doors and gates, and take the phones off the hook,.

Kristen,

I still think you should let Peter take Pepe for just a quick spin around town to celebrate his drivers license. I would.

Ron

hey,littlecobra · #**2266** (**permalink**) 12-20-2006, 07:32 AM

Haven't taught him how to drive a stick yet... not sure the Cobra is the best place to learn.
Looking at a new car.... (for me?) and it would have a stick, so he could learn on that. maybe.

I'll call you Saturday- and you better answer!!!!

ps. i don't know why you're saying we're having all the fun....
I am not.

Ron61 · #**2267** (**permalink**) 12-20-2006, 08:14 AM

PC Merry Christmas!! Merry Christmas and Happy New year to all of you.

Ron

flipper35 · #**2268** (**permalink**) 12-20-2006, 11:42 AM

Happy birthday early Ron.

Ron61 · #**2269** (**permalink**) 12-20-2006, 01:49 PM

Thanks Brent. It is Saturday and I was telling one of my friends that works for my dentist this morning about me and others sitting around trying to decide what to name the wheel when they invented it. She thought that was funny as she is just going to turn 50 in a short while and she said that makes her feel much better. She said she felt like she was on the down hill side and I told her I had been on the down hill side for so long I don't know if it has an end.

Ron

wtm442 · #**2270** (**permalink**) 12-20-2006, 02:30 PM

Ron
The downhill slide can be a lot of fun. My father died when he was 94 years young and he had about 75 girlfriends. He was even chasing the nurses in the nursing home just before he died.

Just heard the FedEx truck ... I wonder what he left for me. I got a nice Christmas package from a friend and her husband in the Netherlands yeasterday. Special pancake mix, gourmet coffee beans, maple syrup and some HOT SAUCE. They are planning a trip next summer and want to go for a ride in the Cobra.

Sharroll Celby · #**2271** (**permalink**) 12-20-2006, 05:14 PM

Hot sauce? Really? Is it hot sauce, or HOT sauce? lol !!!

(I know a couple of good HOT sauces!)

flipper35 · #**2272** (**permalink**) 12-20-2006, 05:29 PM

So Ron, what did they use for a lube on the first wheels? I imagined some animal fat or something. Did they have the BB (Ox) SB (Donkey) debate back then too?

trularin · #**2273** (**permalink**) 12-20-2006, 05:41 PM

Happy holidays everyone!!!!

Aren't we a bit early???

I got my wife a bunch of stuff, can't wait to see her and the boys open their presents.

WOOO, Ron has turned 29...again. Happy happy Ron.

flipper35 · #**2274** (**permalink**) 12-20-2006, 05:45 PM

He still looks younger than Charleton Heston.

392cobra · #**2275** (**permalink**) 12-20-2006, 07:39 PM

The Big Surprise for Josh came off without a hitch.

Told him I wanted to get a quick picture of him.
I got the camera ready and said "Josh,smile when you see your Christmas Present."

Him : What Present ..where ???
Me: That red car behind me. CLICK

Sitting in his car for the first time.

wtm442 · #**2276** (**permalink**) 12-20-2006, 09:36 PM

sniffle .... where is my surprise ?????????????

Ron61 · #**2277** (**permalink**) 12-21-2006, 06:36 AM

Fred,

Great pictures. And I would have smiled too for a present like that. Get me one and I MAY Kiss your Frog.

Ron

Tru,

What do you mean early for the holidays. WalMarts has had Christmas decorations up and music playing since 4 days before Thanksgiving. This is just 4 days before Christmas. Thanks for the 29 again but you should have put the 9 in front of it since everyone already knows.

Ron

hey,littlecobra · #**2278** (**permalink**) 12-21-2006, 07:09 AM

terrific, Fred!!!!

So, how was the drive home???
Peter has YET to drive by himself. Too messy. Probably today. Should I follow him???

Calendars are mailed. Anybody else want one???

Edley??
think I'm going to finish up my shopping today. Need to buy giftwrap as well. Concerned about putting gifts under the trees, as Sparkle 1. claims the trees as hers, and 2. she chews up everything!

She did not poo in the house last night. (well, that i can find) yea!!!!
She is already growing, and having a hard time fitting thru the chihuahua's doggy door. It is hilarious....

Must get handyman here to bump up a size or two.

have a great day!

hey, Ron. still getting royalties from inventing the wheel??

Ron61 · #**2279** (**permalink**) 12-21-2006, 07:17 AM

No royalties from the wheel. Lawyers hadn't been invented back in those days.

Ron

392cobra · #**2280** (**permalink**) 12-21-2006, 08:03 AM

Is this a preview of Kristen's long awaited Pepe/Pink Thong Calender ???