I'm A Senior Citizen

[Ron61]

Subject: I'm a senior citizen

Senior citizens are constantly being criticized for every conceivable deficiency of the modern world, real or imaginary. We know we take responsibility for all we have done and do not blame others.

HOWEVER, upon reflection, we would like to point out that it was NOT senior citizens who took:
The melody out of music,
The pride out of appearance,
The courtesy out of driving,
The romance out of love,
The commitment out of marriage,
The responsibility out of parenthood,
The togetherness out of the family,
The learning out of education,
The service out of patriotism,
The Golden Rule from rulers,
The nativity scene out of cities,
The civility out of behavior,
The refinement out of language,
The dedication out of employment,
The prudence out of spending,
The ambition out of achievement, or,
God out of government and school.

And we certainly are NOT the ones who eliminated patience and tolerance from personal relationships and interactions with others!!

And, we do understand the meaning of patriotism, and remember those who have fought and died for our country.

YES, I'M A SENIOR CITIZEN!

I'm the life of the party...... even if it lasts until 8 p.m.
I'm very good at opening childproof caps.... with a hammer.
I'm usually interested in going home before I get to where I am going.
I'm awake many hours before my body allows me to get up.
I'm smiling all the time because I can't hear a thing you're saying.
I'm very good at telling stories; over and over and over and over...
I'm aware that other people's grandchildren are not nearly as cute as mine.
I'm so cared for -- long term care, eye care, private care, dental care.

I'm not really grouchy,

I just don't like traffic, waiting, crowds, lawyers, loud music, unruly kids, Toyota commercials, Tom Brokaw, Dan Rather, barking dogs, politicians and a few other things I can't seem to remember right now.

I'm sure everything I can't find is in a safe secure place, somewhere.

I'm wrinkled, saggy, lumpy, and that's just my left leg.

I'm having trouble remembering simple words like.......

I'm beginning to realizing that aging is not for wimps.

I'm sure they are making adults much younger these days, and when did they let kids become policemen?
< BR>I'm wondering, if you're only as old as you feel, how could I be alive at 150?

And, how can my kids be older than I feel sometimes?

I'm a walking storeroom of facts..... I've just lost the key to the storeroom door.


Yes, I'm a SENIOR CITIZEN and I think I am having the time of my life!
Now if I could only remember who sent this to me, I wouldn't send it back to them, but I would send it to many more!

Ron

[meat]

You're being too hard on yourself. Senior citizens have given us many great inventions:

- cutting-edge hip replacement surgery
- sansabelt pants
- wide white belts (worn with sansabelt pants)
- 24 hour yogurt shops
- green jello with ... something ... in it
- Matlock
- perfect condition 70s cars that are never driven
- hearing aids that can whistle a happy tune
- ridiculously inbred tiny dogs
- cats that are made of nothing but fur and hairballs
- ribbon candy that can sit in a bowl for decades, outlasting twinkies
- the phrase 'back in my day' which can be applied to any situation
- geritol
- maalox
- selective hearing
- golf carts as offensive weaponry

...and many more. Thank you, to the greatest generation!

Your pal,
Meat.

[bomelia]

AARP, stupid commercials about vascular disease, stupid commercials about life insurance, stupid commercials about burial insurance, oh, scuze me, thats all AARP. How about "help! I've fallen and I can't get up!". The Scooter Store! "My wife, I think I'll keep her" (ok, thats old). Oh, I know!! Larry King!! And Seeking Solutions with Suzanne" (golly she is scarry).

Mike (who just got his first invite from AARP)

[Ron61]

Mike,

Better grab it while yo can. And that stupid commercial about Help I've fallen and can't get up makes me want them to just leave her there.

Ron