02-01-2007, 09:37 AM
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Senior Club Cobra Member
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Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Sacramento,
CA
Cobra Make, Engine: Shelby CSX4795 (Sold)
Posts: 1,542
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Not Ranked
Sac town Barbie!
Mattel recently announced the release of the improved limited-edition
Barbie Dolls for the Greater Sacramento market:
" Roseville Barbie"
This princess Barbie is sold only at the Galleria Mall. She
comes with an assortment of Coach Handbags, a Lexus SUV, a long-haired
foreign dog named Honey and a cookie-cutter house. Available with or
without tummy tuck and face lift. Workaholic Ken sold only in
conjunction with the augmented version.
" Granite Bay Barbie"
The modern day homemaker Barbie is available with Ford Wind
star Minivan and matching gym outfit. She gets lost easily and has no
full-time occupation. Traffic jamming cell phone sold separately.
" Rio Linda Barbie"
This recently paroled Barbie comes with a 9mm handgun, a Ray
Lewis knife, a Chevy with dark tinted windows, and a Meth Lab Kit. This
model is only available after dark and must be paid for in cash
(preferably small, untraceable bills) unless you are a cop, then we
don't know what you are talking about.
"Stanford Ranch Barbie"
This yuppie Barbie comes with your choice of BMW convertible or
Hummer H2. Included are her own Starbucks cup, credit card and country
club membership. Also available for this set are Shallow Ken and
Private School Skipper. You won't be able to afford any of them.
"Colfax Barbie"
This pale model comes dressed in her own Wrangler jeans two
sizes too small, a NASCAR t-shirt and tweety bird tattoo on her
shoulder. She has a six-pack of Bud light and a Hank Williams Jr. CD
set. She can spit over 5 feet and kick mullet-haired Ken's butt when
she is drunk. Purchase her pickup truck separately and get a
confederate flag bumper sticker absolutely free.
" Lincoln Barbie"
This tobacco-chewing, brassy-haired Barbie has a pair of her
own high-heeled sandals with one broken heel from the time she chased
beer-gutted Ken out of Lincoln Barbie's house. Her ensemble includes
low-rise acid-washed jeans, fake fingernails, and a see-through
halter-top. Also available with a mobile home.
"Midtown Barbie"
This doll is made of actual tofu. She has long straight brown
hair, arch-less feet, hairy armpits, no makeup and Birkenstocks with
white socks. She prefers that you call her Willow . She does not want
or need a Ken doll, but if you purchase two Midtown Barbies and the
optional Subaru wagon, you get a rainbow flag bumper sticker for free.
"Laguna Barbie"
This Barbie now comes with a stroller and infant doll. Optional
accessories include a GED and bus pass. Gangsta Ken and his 1979 Caddy
were available, but are now very difficult to find since the addition
of the infant.
jdog
__________________
"If you can't run with the BIG DOGS, stay under the porch!"
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